You are quite mistaken if you think it is my quiet time right now.
Even if it seems that
The walls are safe around me
And all I do is sleep…
In here, my headphones are blasting. Crashing me on
To run and get away and burst out
To live a thing that’s not been lived by others
A big adventure mapping out in dreams…
I just don’t quite know the way I’ll go yet
Or where I would fit.
Remember, I don’t have money.
No, I don’t want a job.
If only you could see inside my head
You’d understand the wrenching nightmare.
Where girl and woman are one and the same
But one is extricating herself from the other
Myself from myself
Or maybe, I should say, in a metamorphosis of common sorts
One is creating the other
Myself from myself
In my own image – flesh of my flesh, bone of my bones –
Either way
One of us is being taken
Through the channels, flickering.
Though there seems to be no one else around
Someone watching has seen this sort of thing happen before.
And every hidden body is peering from their black soul windows
As myself and myself are transiting furtively
Past the bystanders,
Sidling against their walls
As if we’re actors in their favourite show, the episode
Of the kidnap –
Stop.
Arrest that woman…
No one comes to help.
Surely surely surely surely something must happen next.
Because this is getting so long.
We must be going somewhere along the wall.
Or the wall must lead somewhere at least or
Do I have to make a doorway that fits?
That’s me. That shape. And here we are.
And where do we go to from here?
And so, that is what I have to say about this event:
Yes, there is a child being taken.
She is me.